How to overcome self doubt?

Erase self doubt by working to build your strength instead of focusing on your weaknesses.
– Rodolfo Costa

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Will I be able to do it?
Am I beautiful?
Am I good enough?
What if I fail in completing this?
What if I make mistakes and end up in trouble?
What if I get stuck in between?
What if they don’t like me at all?
Will I look good in this cloths?
Am I so ugly?


Sounds familiar?
Self-doubt is something we all go through from time to time. Some of us know how to cross that thin barrier and some us just believe those thoughts and give up. And it is quite normal to give up in such situations. But what if you can actually make those same thoughts your strength?
Wouldn’t it be amazing?

I believe that self doubt can be very useful even though it is the only thing that stops us to take that one step which can change our life. Self doubt gives us a reality check about our own self-esteem and confidence. It is a voice in our brain that tells us that we need to learn more, practice more and appreciate the efforts we are putting in to achieving whatever it is that we are looking to have in life.

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The first place self doubt takes birth is our own brain. Whenever we are preparing for something which is extremely important for us, we start doubting our own abilities. Many times it occurs due to our social circle or peer pressure or even our family members. Often we are surrounded with people who take a dig on us and underestimate us in front of everyone. And instead of supporting us, other people make fun of us or they just stay quite. And their laughs and statements starts making a nest in our mind which results in self doubt.

When you really work hard and give your best and end up failing, it is obvious to feel unaccomplished and we start saying ourselves that we are good for nothing or we are just plain dumb. Which is actually not the fact. It is important to understand that mistakes and failures are the only way to learn and expertise your skills in your desired fields.

Self doubt also creeps within you when it comes to your looks or personality. When it comes to these things we usually rely on other’s opinion and believe the same. But it is always said so that as long as you don’t give value to yourself, others won’t give value to you as well. Personality is something which flourishes with self love, self confidence and compassion.

In my opinion we should start owning those thoughts and challenge them within us to overcome self doubt. Make it the ladder to becoming more confident about yourself.

Practice positive affirmation and gratitude.
In many of my posts I have recommend this, and I can say it again and again that practicing positive affirmation helps in a great way. Having a gratitude mindset helps you develop self confidence.

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Self love.
Loving yourself and appreciating yourself will make you feel nourished and blessed. It changes your thoughts and gives you the will to keep trying for yourself.

Celebrate your small achievements and validate it yourself.
Whenever you get a small success, appreciate it and celebrate it. Validate yourself by judging your own efforts. This will give you a push to try in a better way and move towards bigger goals.

Be kind to yourself.
When you see someone trying very hard in something, you always show kindness to them right. You tell them that they doing good, so why not do the same to yourself.

Be mindful of the way you think.
Have you heard of the saying, “The way you think, the same you become.”
So be careful about how you think about yourself. If you will keep having negative thoughts about yourself then that is what you will become eventually.

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Talk to someone you feel very supportive of.
When you are feeling very sad and down, try talking to someone who supports you in every situations. Try sharing your feelings to them. They will definitely help you see the brightness within you.

Stop comparing.
Till the time you will keep comparing your life with others, your life will remain within a limit. Make your life boundless and limitless.

Appreciate your own strengths.
Rather than focusing on your weaknesses try looking into the things in which you are good at. Even if it is about your looks, try focusing what feature is more beautiful about you. What makes you different than other?

Upgrade your skills and learn in the process.
The best way to overcome self doubt is to keep making yourself better. Keep learning and a time will come you will understand how it made you come this far.

Take inspiration from live examples.
If you admire someone, then try to learn from their life about how they made it in their life to where they are today.

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Stop making excuses and take actions.
Instead of talking about plans and thinking how to reach there, take the first step. It might help you go up the ladder sooner.

Try avoiding people who belittle you.
It might be happening that your acquaintances are impacting you in a much deeper level. You might be taking it very sportively but somewhere in the the corner of your brain, your subconscious mind starts believe those people who always belittle you. Try avoiding them as much as possible.

Start journaling.
In one of my post I have mentioned in detail about how journaling changes your life. It increase your inner strengths and helps you learn about yourself.

I seek strength, not to be greater than other, but to fight my greatest enemy, the doubts within myself.
– P.C Cast

I hope you this post helps you to overcome all the flaws you find within you. Please like and follow my page to get the future updates from my website and please write your suggestions below in the comment section to help me improve my posts.

Thank You!
Have a great day ahead.

Sayonara!

Pratha Nayak

Ways to keep toxic people at bay!

Pay no attention to toxic words. What people say is often a reflection of themselves, not you.
– Christian Baloga

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How many times have you felt suffocated by your surroundings? Does it makes you feel like bursting into flames? Or do you feel like drowning yourself? Well may be you need to understand that you might be living in a toxic environment. Often we are in company of bunch of self-absorbed people who always belittle you for every move you make.

As human beings, we tend to live in a group of people as so called “society”, we often cross path with some particular kind of people who are very difficult to tolerate. And doesn’t matter how much we try, we cannot avoid them. Honestly it’s not worth the energy to even try. So we make up our mind to just adjust with the situation. We socialize with this people day in and day out without a choice. And when we do that somehow they get the power to mess with our brain and feelings. And we let them.

But can you really save yourself from this torment? Of course you can! We have a tendency to please people around us and that’s what gets us in this problem in first place.
“Will I look bad if I try to fight?”
“Will it be rude to stand up for myself at this situation?”
“People will talk about me if I say this out loud?”
“Will I lose my job if I object?”
“What if I end up alone if I avoid these people?”
Sounds familiar right!

I go through this situations as well. And when we keep our feelings and anger bottled up for long time, we become depressed and frustrated. At times we end up hurting people who are actually good and important to us. People who actually care for us. How is that any good? But may be we can change that. May be if we know how to deal with toxic people, we can stay happy and live with a healthy mind set. I am going to list down some ways to keep these kind of people at bay.

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Recognize the toxic nature- First we need to recognize who are these people and what kind of nature they have. Do they make you uncomfortable with there statements? They are negative about anything and everything you do. They will always discourage you for any action you take for your own betterment. When you share your creative ideas, they might make fun of you and joke around in front of others. Don’t worry, it’s not about you. It is about them never coming up with anything good by themselves. And you cannot change them by any means. You can’t save them from their own hell.

Set limits and boundaries- Set boundaries about socializing with them. I understand it is not always possible to avoid these people all the time but try reducing it to minimum. Meet them or talk to them when it is really necessary.

Be on the positive side- You need to believe in yourself first. Be so confident about yourself that no one can break you with snarky comments. If you have goals to achieve, then stop listening to people who underestimate your ideas. Don’t show them your weakness, or they will some how find a way to creep inside your head again. Self preservation should be your main motto. Remember it is their own self incompetence that makes them behave that way.

Break it off- If it is intolerable just break it off. It is definitely not worth it to keep these people in your life, if all they do is break you from inside. You may lose some more friends along with them but at least you will learn to live with your dignity intact.

Learn to stand up for yourself- At times you have to fight for yourself. Because when you stay quite, you give them the power to control you and your brain. You start behaving the way they want. If you are in a situation where you feel insulted and humiliated, just say the things that you believe and walk away.

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Try making healthy relationships- Try making new friends or try hanging out with people who really appreciate your presence. What’s the point of hanging out with people who talk about you in a bad way when you are not around. People who are true to you and actually like you, won’t talk bad about you or make fun of you behind your back. So hang out with people who actually care about you and help you grow in life. Who can have your back when you try to conquer the world.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambition.
-Mark Twain

I hope you found this helpful. Please remember you can get out of such situation gracefully without hurting yourself. Please like and follow my page to get the future updates from my website and please write your suggestions below in the comment section to help me improve my posts.

Thank You!
Have a great day ahead.

Sayonara!

Pratha Nayak

Ways to stop worrying about what others think about you!

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
– Albert Einstein

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Hello everyone
In our society people often spend half of their time thinking what others are thinking about them. Even I do the same. But are you really being fair to yourself? We suppress our wishes and dreams just for the sake of people who actually doesn’t matter much. I mean is someone else going to live your life for you. We care too much about what society will think. We don’t give our own happiness much priority and go against what is actually right for us. I feel it is really the norm of our so called “society” which pressurize us to do what they feel is correct. They try to control our life and steal the happiness and our right to live a fulfilling life. I mean we really live once. Right!!!

We plan so many things for our future and make course of actions, and these people they suddenly jump into an opportunity to criticize us for it and say that it is a wrong thing to do. And eventually we end up doing what others want us do, which makes us miserable and unhappy. It takes real courage to stand up to this people and go through your plan. And once you succeed, the same people will be standing by your side saying that, “We are really happy for you and we are proud of your success.”.

Have it ever occurred to you that may be these people also did the same thing in their life by being pressurized by others? And they want you to do the same as well, because they don’t know any other way.

At times even your own family members will be standing against your wishes. The same family members who love you and want you to be happy, be safe and well-settled. But until and unless you are happy, can they be happy around you? I don’t think so. It is really like a process which people have created through rules and regulations which you have to follow and stay in the pothole where there is no escape.

But to really be happy in life and really achieve your goals, you have to break some rules. And for breaking those rules there will be some consequences which you actually have to go through for a certain span of time. Once you have crossed that barrier, the world will be your oyster. I know it is easy to say but difficult to implement. But have anyone achieved anything without a struggle? Or will you feel accomplished without going through the struggle?

NO!!

Today I want to share few ways with you all which might help you in surviving those situations and really go ahead with your choices. People will talk. Today it is you, tomorrow it will be someone else. But it is you who have to live your life.

Focus what is important for you.
If you focus really on what is important to you, then you can ignore all those chatter easily. Because you will be busy taking the actions towards achieving what you want in life.

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Love and accept yourself.
People will point out your flaws all the time. Keep in mind that those are the flaws in their eyes because it is an inconvenience for them. They will say lot of bad things about you, behind your back because they can’t really handle you. So it is their problem. You need to love yourself the way you are. Own yourself.

It’s your life.
Well if you break your leg, will some else go through the pain while your leg is healing? No right? Then if something wrong happens in your life, will someone else struggle for you. It is your life! You have to live it. No one is going to live your life for you. It is you who have to take full responsibility of your life. If you make mistake, it is you who have to fix it. If you are successful, it is you who is going to enjoy it. Others can be there for you in your happiness and sadness, but they can’t really live it. So think about what you are going to do.

People don’t care that much.
We spend lot of our time, literally wasting our time being anxious over what everyone will say. “What they will think.” Well flashing news!! People don’t have that much time. Everyone is busy trying to survive their own life. No one has that much time to think about what you are doing. And if there are such people, then think like this that “they really don’t have anything better to do with their lives.”

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Keep perspective.
Other people opinion is often based on their own life principles and experiences. What they think is good may not be good for you. What is working for them may not work for you. Every person has their own personality and thought process. You have to discover what is best for you and work it out
.

Don’t go for perfection.
Perfection is actually over rated. At times flaws gives you the best experience. If you keep trying to be perfect for others, then you will surely fall way down on your own peace of mind.

You can’t please everyone.
If there are ten people around you, can you make everyone happy? Each person will have their own choices, is it your job to fulfill everyone’s demands? It is nearly impossible to please each and everyone. In one way or other, you will make some one sad. But that is okay. You don’t need to be a people pleaser.

You know what is best for you.
When you visualize your dreams, you know how much happy it will make you to achieve those in reality. And you know it will be the best thing that you can do for yourself. So don’t hesitate. Live your dreams and do what is best for you.

Honestly what other people think in their own time is none of your business.
Really I don’t need to say anything here. Will you be offended if someone blames you for thinking something in your head in your own time? Of-course you will be. You will immediately say that, “It’s none of your business”. Then why do we make it our business by what others are thinking in their head in their own space.

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Life is too short.
We never know how much time we really have to live on this earth. And it is really not worth it to waste this short life by being anxious, worried and sad.

Spend life with the people who make you happy, not the people who you have to impress.

I hope you can find those points helpful in some way and ease yourself. Please like and follow my page to get the future updates from my website and please write your suggestions below in the comment section to help me improve my posts.

Thank You!
Have a great day ahead.

Sayonara!

Pratha Nayak