How you love yourself is
how you teach others to love you.
– Rupi Kaur
Pay no attention to toxic words. What people say is often a reflection of themselves, not you.
– Christian Baloga
How many times have you felt suffocated by your surroundings? Does it makes you feel like bursting into flames? Or do you feel like drowning yourself? Well may be you need to understand that you might be living in a toxic environment. Often we are in company of bunch of self-absorbed people who always belittle you for every move you make.
As human beings, we tend to live in a group of people as so called “society”, we often cross path with some particular kind of people who are very difficult to tolerate. And doesn’t matter how much we try, we cannot avoid them. Honestly it’s not worth the energy to even try. So we make up our mind to just adjust with the situation. We socialize with this people day in and day out without a choice. And when we do that somehow they get the power to mess with our brain and feelings. And we let them.
But can you really save yourself from this torment? Of course you can! We have a tendency to please people around us and that’s what gets us in this problem in first place.
“Will I look bad if I try to fight?”
“Will it be rude to stand up for myself at this situation?”
“People will talk about me if I say this out loud?”
“Will I lose my job if I object?”
“What if I end up alone if I avoid these people?”
Sounds familiar right!
I go through this situations as well. And when we keep our feelings and anger bottled up for long time, we become depressed and frustrated. At times we end up hurting people who are actually good and important to us. People who actually care for us. How is that any good? But may be we can change that. May be if we know how to deal with toxic people, we can stay happy and live with a healthy mind set. I am going to list down some ways to keep these kind of people at bay.
Recognize the toxic nature- First we need to recognize who are these people and what kind of nature they have. Do they make you uncomfortable with there statements? They are negative about anything and everything you do. They will always discourage you for any action you take for your own betterment. When you share your creative ideas, they might make fun of you and joke around in front of others. Don’t worry, it’s not about you. It is about them never coming up with anything good by themselves. And you cannot change them by any means. You can’t save them from their own hell.
Set limits and boundaries- Set boundaries about socializing with them. I understand it is not always possible to avoid these people all the time but try reducing it to minimum. Meet them or talk to them when it is really necessary.
Be on the positive side- You need to believe in yourself first. Be so confident about yourself that no one can break you with snarky comments. If you have goals to achieve, then stop listening to people who underestimate your ideas. Don’t show them your weakness, or they will some how find a way to creep inside your head again. Self preservation should be your main motto. Remember it is their own self incompetence that makes them behave that way.
Break it off- If it is intolerable just break it off. It is definitely not worth it to keep these people in your life, if all they do is break you from inside. You may lose some more friends along with them but at least you will learn to live with your dignity intact.
Learn to stand up for yourself- At times you have to fight for yourself. Because when you stay quite, you give them the power to control you and your brain. You start behaving the way they want. If you are in a situation where you feel insulted and humiliated, just say the things that you believe and walk away.
Try making healthy relationships- Try making new friends or try hanging out with people who really appreciate your presence. What’s the point of hanging out with people who talk about you in a bad way when you are not around. People who are true to you and actually like you, won’t talk bad about you or make fun of you behind your back. So hang out with people who actually care about you and help you grow in life. Who can have your back when you try to conquer the world.
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambition.
I hope you found this helpful. Please remember you can get out of such situation gracefully without hurting yourself. Please like and follow my page to get the future updates from my website and please write your suggestions below in the comment section to help me improve my posts.
Have a great day ahead.